5:45am
Roused by my husband’s alarm I wake to nurse and comfort a rousing baby. I don't keep track of night feeds anymore, it all blurs into one, but I know I have been awake. Through blurry eyes I find my son and feed him. My husband starts to get ready for work and I hear the faint sounds of children stirring in their beds. I pray for one more hours sleep.6:30am
Husband has left for work and the baby is drifting off to sleep but now the toddler is waking and wants a cuddle. Snuggled into bed with me the toddler quietly waits for his big brothers to wake, every few minutes I hear the quiet chant of "momma, breakfast, momma, breakfast"...I guess he's hungry.
7:00am
Everyone is awake but a little too early for breakfast so I distract with educational videos on YouTube whilst I try and read my bible.
7:30am
The toddler is getting more vocal and in the quiet morning his voice sounds like a foghorn and is almost screaming "breakfast". Ok, I give in, breakfast it is. I set the table and prepare breakfast. Amidst seeing to the children I juggle a hungry baby, freshly woken by an excitable toddler, and mop up spills, and somehow manage to eat something myself. I change the baby's nappy and dress him for the day and carry on pacing floors with him whilst I encourage the boys to tidy up the kitchen after breakfast.
8:15am
The toddler needs to be dressed and I jump in the shower and wash in record timing...the baby really needs feeing now. I feed the baby whilst playing a game with the toddler and instructing the big brothers to dress and brush their teeth. After the baby is satisfied I am able to dress myself and put on a load of washing and encourage my happy helpers to sort and put away the previous days laundry. Much instruction is still needed in the art of folding clothes neatly.
9:15am
I put the baby in the sling and vacuum the floors and stairs, stopping in between to offer the big brothers some instruction in relation to their maths work they are completing. The toddler is playing with playdough at the table and I find the homemade playdough activity sheets I had made.
9:45am
I pause with the housework to devote some time in instructing the eldest with his language arts. Baby is fussing so I feed him whilst making the final alterations to my shopping list.
10:30am
After bundling children into coats and shoes and into the car we head to the supermarket to buy food for the next two weeks. It's a juggling act with keeping baby happy in the trolley, stopping toddler from damaging the food, hovering next to the trolley as my Michael Schumacher boy steers the trolley ready to be the brake, and issue instructions on which foods to choose to my eldest. With the trolley filled we head to the checkout and unload the mountain of produce onto the conveyor belt. No sooner has it gone on I am at the other end loading it into bags. I begin to be organised and try separate the frozen from the tinned goods, the dairy from the fruit and veg, but the speed of the cashier means that pretty soon we are dumping the goods into any available space. Shopping done we load up the car and head home.
12 noon
Back home and the shopping needs unpacking but the baby needs feeding. Attempted to do both at the same time whilst hungry toddler starts trying to find food to eat, packets too hard to open but the fruit is easy to get to, toddler starts to eat multiple pieces of fruit before I discovered his antics.
12:30pm
Making lunch for the tribe now. I lose count of the number of slices of bread that I was buttering. Plate up lunch and call the children to the table. A moments peace as hungry children tuck into their food and I bounce a baby on my knee. Whilst enjoying our food I took the opportunity to do a history quiz on the previous day's reading.
1:15pm
With lunch finished and fresh coffee brewing I set the table for some creative school work of making salt bricks and African masks. As the baby is asleep in the sling and the other children including toddler are happy sticking dried beans and wooden sticks to their African masks I start the ironing. The second load of laundry is put on and the first load put in the dryer or hung around the house to dry. All too soon the masks are done and once again we tidy the kitchen table.
2:00pm
With a little more ironing still to be done I instruct the children to complete their chores and attempted to encourage the toddler to help by timing his activity. A squabble starts between the children, they wake the baby and there are tears. I discipline the children and then comfort the tearful. I give the toddler a cuddle and feed the baby whilst listening to a big brother read. We spend time in prayer and when everyone is happy we play a card game.
3:00pm
We turn to our science project and carry on working on our brochure of earth on the computer and the big brothers take it in turns writing facts about our planet whilst I reheat my cold cup of coffee that got neglected and try and drink it whilst entertaining the toddler and try and get the baby back to sleep again.
3:45pm
Baby is sleeping but the children are starting to get restless again so I put on some music and encourage some dancing and activeness.
4:30pm
I drag myself away from the laughter and into the kitchen as I start preparations for tea and allow the children to have some screen time as I have to concentrate in the kitchen. A rousing baby goes in the sling again as I lull him back to sleep hoping he will stay content until food was ready. Whilst cooking I put the final load of washing in the dryer, transferring the previously dry clothes to their rightful homes.
5:30pm
3 hungry boys start eating and a tired momma sits to eat and nurse the baby. For all of 15 minutes there is peace as hungry bellies are satisfied. All too soon though the call for pudding is heard but plates are not yet empty, the middle 2 children have a hard time eating their vegetables so then I start persuading them to eat their veg. After a lot of persuading pudding is served...yoghurt and fruit...I catch a glimpse of disappointment...what were they expecting? Cake every night!
6:15pm
Time to clear up the kitchen, the children get to their chores as I follow behind issuing helpful advice, trying to train the children in efficient and proper cleaning. With the dishwasher loaded, floor swept and table cleaned the boys go off to have a final play as I finish cleaning the kitchen, once again with the baby in the sling. With the kitchen cleaned there ensues a speedy race around the house to tidy up after the days activities, all the while helping to resolve disputes amongst the children.
7:30pm
Pyjama dressing time, which includes attempting to keep pyjamas on the toddler who loves to undress and battle him or at least with his mouth as I try to clean his teeth. Knowing bedtime is drawing near the children bring out all their tactics for delaying lights out, but I am a seasoned mamma and know their sneaky ways. I have an order of cards to make and I need the boys asleep. The children are bundled onto the bed and the bible is read, taking it in turns to read. We discuss what lessons we have learned and we each pray.
8:15pm
Lights are out but the older boys are still to be heard moving around the bedroom but the toddler's room is silent, peaceful sleep has come to an active boy. The baby feeds and goes in the sling as I begin to make a wedding card and some birthday cards. What used to be a quick craft sometimes now can be lengthy as I move from encouraging the older boys to keep their heads on their pillows and feed and comfort a baby who is more restless of an evening. The phone goes and I speak with my mum whilst continuing to do all of the above. The final load of washing needs moving from the dryer but I am tired, maybe it can be done tomorrow I tell myself.
10:00pm
Husband will be returning from work soon, his long day nearly finished, I am thankful these long days only happen once every 3 weeks. Shift work can be hard but we have generally found our rhythm. I get the baby and myself ready for bed, grab a glass of water for my bedside ready for the night feeds and sit and feed the baby and eagerly wait the return of my husband. He arrives and I spend time catching up with him, asking about his day and filling in him on mine, plans are made for the next day and a list of tasks my husband would like completing made up. Soon lights are out and when baby is asleep I drift off...only for a few hours as the familiar snuffle of the baby is heard, soon followed by the restless turning, the night feeds have begun...wait...was that the toddler I heard as well!
Now if you are still reading this, well done for getting through it. I decided to share with you an example of a typical day in our house because chapter 7 of Womanly Dominion speaks about a mother's elite job description and the author encourages young women to get all the education they can get, not so as to pursue a career primarily, but because as a mother you will draw upon all areas of your life to raise your child. I loved this section:
"A mother is handling things of a far greater magnitude. She's handling never-dying souls. She's daily conducting heart surgery on eternal spirits whose forever destinies are influenced most profoundly by the hands that rock their cradles, wipe their noses...open their bibles, prepare their after-school snacks, and turn off their bedroom lights. Those motherly hands are moulding characters which will become men and women who will turn the world upside down either for good or for evil. Now that's a job that counts."
As mothers our priority focus should be on our families and not on a career we started to fashion through our teenage years. I am not saying that women should never be in the workforce but it is not meant to take us away from the task that God has given us. Motherhood is not something we can do in our spare time. Yes, bills need paying, mouths need feeding and that requires money, but is this the reason why some women choose to work or is there some other reason that drives mothers into the workforce...the lie that women can have it all and be happy? the lie that the workplace is where you find your identity? the lie that full-time mothering is demeaning? Happiness, identity and worthiness will not be found in the workplace, it won't even be found in your homes. Happiness is found when you meet with Jesus, identity is found when you know you are chosen by God, worthiness...try completely unworthy of God's forgiveness but overflowing with thankfulness that He has blotted out my transgressions and heard my cry of repentance.
Do you want to read about mothers who made a difference? Look to the mother of John Newton, author of the hymn 'Amazing Grace', look to the mother of Thomas Edison, inventor of the lightbulb, look to Susanna Wesley (a personal favourite), mother to a preacher and a hymn-writer and 17 other children, look to Sarah Edwards, mother to theologian Jonathan Edwards.
Mark Chanski says of Susanna Wesley,
"In devoting above twenty years of the prime of her life in hopes to save the souls of her children, she not only set aflame her offspring for the kingdom of God, but her nation, and even the entire Western World for the same."
Sometimes I feel the role of a mother can be overwhelming but in those times I look to Christ:
"Fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you may not grow weary and lose heart"
Hebrews 12:2-3
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